Assertive Communication Techniques: Express Your Needs With Tact, Confidence And Respect - Love Quotes Blog

Are there people who generate tension in your life and don't you dare to have that pending conversation? Do you feel manipulated or do not respect you? Are you not able to express your true opinions with some people? For situations of this type it is so important to know some assertive communication techniques.

1. WHAT IS ASERTIVE COMMUNICATION?


Assertive communication is a skill that anyone can develop and that helps us to reduce conflicts, express our opinions and emotions with respect and confidence, without manipulating or being manipulated, being honest with ourselves and with others.

I think we all know people who do the opposite: they communicate aggressively or defensively. People who try to impose their point of view and who are convinced that it is the only one valid, who does not listen or disrespects it All this generates conflicts in our personal and labor relations, but there is also the opposite side: the one who never says anything and is silent because of fear or lack of trust.

Assertiveness is just the opposite and allows us to express ourselves with respect, without getting carried away by the prompt and the emotions, but in a reflexive way that leads us to respect to be respected. Actually, it is to show our maturity with firmness and empathy.

1.1 Assertive behavior requires self-confidence


It is true that it is more difficult to develop assertive communication for a person who lacks confidence or has low self-esteem. In fact, those with these most worked points are not altered so much in compromised situations, they do not shut up before something they should not shut up, nor do they jump to the opposite side losing control and reacting with all the retained rage.

Personal development itself is essential to communicate better and more assertively. Without a doubt, they go hand in hand and help us to limit some situations and people, both in our personal and work life.

There are many situations where we can and should use assertive communication, such as:



► They call you to stay but you are very busy, it hurts and you are not able to say no for fear of what they will say.

► They ask you for a job, a job that doesn't apply to you, but you shut up and accept it without saying anything.

► They call you on the phone and, despite being very busy, you don't know how to cut.

► A behavior of your partner, friend or someone at work is intolerable but you say nothing or explode.

► A misunderstanding or conflict that you are not able to resolve by not knowing how to communicate it.



Developing your own assertive strategies will give your life more confidence, it will help you to know how to say no without feeling guilty and, above all, to avoid the prompt and emotional explosions that we can regret.

2. ASSERTIVE COMMUNICATION TECHNIQUES. EXAMPLES


The pillar of assertive communication is the ability to express our feelings and our needs with confidence, tact and respect, but here are some techniques.



▶ Learn to say an unreasonable
Thank you for the invitation, I thank you for thinking about me but I already have a commitment, I have work to advance or I need to rest. Just be honest. In some cases that can not become a temporary no to leave the door open.



▶ Show the effect of your negative behavior
It consists of showing your feelings and your need.

I know it's not your intention, but when you do (whatever you do) that makes me feel (be honest and honest) and I would appreciate it if you didn't.



▶ Show your understanding and need
First you recognize something in the person or in the act, you let him know that you understand and then show your posture, your need or your rights.

I understand what you do, but when you do that ... (show the consequence)
I understand your posture, but from there .. (show impact)


▶ Assertive response to aggressive behavior
Putting a mirror in front of the other person can be a good remedy. It means making him see how he is behaving and the consequences he has. Generally, people only maintain negative behavior because they are getting some benefit.

Express yourself firmly:

I'm sorry but until you speak to me with respect and education I will not talk to you and I hope you understand why I do it.
The more you scream and the less you listen, the more I block and the less I can express myself. I need you to calm down and listen to me in order to understand each other.
▶ When you have an argument, remember to discuss the problem, not with the person.
▶ The way to win a game against a toxic person is not to play it.
Before arguing with someone, ask yourself if that person is mature enough to consider points of view other than their own. Otherwise, it makes no sense to have that conversation. I recommend you read this article: toxic people (how to identify them).

We receive what we tolerate, they treat us how we treat each other, so first and foremost make yourself respect and respect.